No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
