she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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