dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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