sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
