She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
