Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Princesses don't give blow jobs
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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