hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
