I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
