Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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