When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
