dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
