We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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