so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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