Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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