what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize