Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
