I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
