Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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