he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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