I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
