There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
