I just pynch a tree in the face
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
