It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
