Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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