The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
pray to the hookup gods
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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