Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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