we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
