Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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