New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
She bit a glass in half.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
