i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
