i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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