it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
