hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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