He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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