My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
