I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
