It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize