I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize