I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
