Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize