Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
