Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
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