I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
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