i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
