Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize