so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
