is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize