i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
