Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
