At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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